freak magnet

pet psychics and biblical ichthyology

by meanlouise December 23, 2012 true life 2012

I’m trying to write an article about the genetically modified salmon developed by AquaBounty. What I want to know is this: do salmon who are being forced to grow abnormally fast suffer? Fish are animals and they feel pain, although these factors are frequently ignored. It’s the weekend before Christmas so it’s not the best […]

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Larry King and Lady Gaga are the Same

by meanlouise March 2, 2011 culture

We’re on a postal route that doesn’t have an assigned mail carrier. Some of the carriers are great. Some are insane. Consequently, sometimes our mail arrives at exactly 9 a.m.. Other times it arrives whenever the neighbor who happened to receive it drops it off or puts it back into the mail as mis-delivered mail. […]

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Amazing Grace (Freak Magnetism, explained)

by meanlouise September 21, 2010 reader favorites

I am a Freak Magnet. This means I attract Freaks. Non-Freak Magnets don’t understand this, and you can’t ever fully explain the depths of wackiness a Freak plumbs when they encounter a Magnet. Freaks aren’t normal people who engage in small-talk while stuck in an interminable line, or ask you to help them find a […]

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I am not the buddha you seek

by meanlouise May 26, 2010 true life 2010

This evening I was killing a bit of time at a coffeeshop before class. A woman walked up to me, introduced herself as a meditation leader at one of the local sanghas, and proceeded to ask me if she could bask in my, and I quote, “soothing yellow aura” for a few minutes to ground […]

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Dude, the sun has now set on your Empire. Deal with it.

by meanlouise February 18, 2009 true life 2009

You must understand by now that putting me on Metro without a companion is like rubbing a rolly-polly baby in bacon grease and tossing him or her into a pit of ravenously hungry beasts. Okay, it’s nothing like that; but it can be a trying experience. I am a FreakMagnet. Tuesday I was on the […]

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Law of the Universe #16

by meanlouise November 8, 2007 true life 2007

Many weird things happen to me, for I am a powerful Freak Magnet. But my magnetism is by and large limited to people. Faith’s magnetism is far mightier. It is one of the known Laws of the Universe that no matter how strange my life gets, Faith’s will always be stranger. Apparently, her magnetism also […]

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stranger than fiction

by meanlouise November 6, 2006 true life 2006

Despite recent posting evidence to the contrary, I’m the last person to suggest that life is anything like the movies. Nevertheless, I must describe the events of today because even I thought them a little too cleverly and conveniently plotted. I ventured out of doors today (which is, in itself, newsworthy since I have been […]

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norwegians, the yellow bellied sapsucker, and, of course, a deer

by meanlouise November 18, 2005 art

A couple of days ago I had plans to attend an early evening meeting and then stop by the Hirshhorn for cocktails and a gander at the Gyroscope show. I took the Metro, so you already know that I’m about to tell you that wackiness ensued. I ended up playing tourguide to a Norwegian soccer […]

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hell, other people

by meanlouise October 7, 2004 artomatic

I’ve been doing crazy amounts of stuff that have been keeping me running around like, well, the crazy-woman I am. I don’t have the stomach for community organizing, I’ve learned (read: enduring threats and learning what overt racism exists in dc-metro area). I prefer being knee-deep in artomatic organizing, which is hard work but lots […]

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freak magnet

by meanlouise May 11, 2003 true life 2003

About 10 minutes into my journey, I (and everyone else on the bus) discovered that the bus had the wrong route number on it. We discovered this when the driver made an unexpected turn and started heading the wrong way. This was okay with me, since I most sincerely wanted off that particular bus. The […]

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