Category Archives: politics

wtfuckabee

It was a big night last night. I’m sure you all gathered your loved ones around the teevee to anxiously await Mike Huckabee’s live media event:

Sadly, when Huckabee opened the vault to determine whether or not he should run for President, he found Michaele Salahi and Geraldo eating peanut butter and fluffernutter sandwiches on Wonder Bread. He then made a statement about looking into his heart and his heart telling him not to run, presumably because his heart had just had a conference call with his bank account and didn’t want to give up all the filthy lucre that pours in from FOX for doing shows like this.

NerdProm

We didn’t go to the White House Correspondents Association Dinner, but we drove through the chaos on our way to Eighteenth Street Lounge. Being true nerds, the first thing we did when we got home was watch the videos.

How great was Michele Obama’s hair? (Great!)

I was just going to embed the video for the fake trailer for “The President’s Speech” because it’s very funny, and very short compared to all of the speeches that went on around it:

But I decided to include the President’s whole speech (which includes the trailer) because otherwise you miss out on all of the Donald Trump jokes, and the priceless reaction shots by Trump.

And if I’m including the President’s speech, I really need to include the Trump-skewering Seth Meyers speech that followed:

Enjoy!

Dave Petraeus, a singing orangutan & a dog who looks like Donald Trump walk into a bar….

The changes at the CIA are serious bizness. Consequently, it’s a little annoying that everytime I read something about David Petraeus I picture him dancing around dressed like an orangutan. It’s because of this:

Which over the years has combined with this Simpson’s sketch about Planet of the Apes, the musical:

I know, I know, I need to get out more. Or watch the news less.

Oh, the news, the news.

Did you watch any 24 hour cable news channels yesterday? I did. I watched them all.

What’s that you’re saying? You have a life?

Well, you’re in luck, because Hank Stuever tells you what you missed. And yesterday, you missed cable news in an episode of ADD that we haven’t seen in a long time. Stuever writes, in today’s Washington Post TV Review column:

It was like watching a crazy uncle — some still call him Sam — have another of his little episodes, what the nation’s overworked home health-care aides would call “an active day.” The country’s up outta the recliner and straight through the back screen door and over the fence. Again.

Good stuff. Stuever’s column, that is, not cable news.

Honestly, I didn’t watch that much TV yesterday because it was too ridiculous, even for me.

Even. For. Me.

Think about that for a minute, people.

I caught a little bit of Ben Bernanke’s press conference and then when they switched over to a segment on dogs who looked like the royal couple. Or maybe they were dressed like the royal couple. Or were going to watch the royal wedding while in costumes. Or preferred to pee on newspapers with articles about the royal wedding. Or maybe the dogs want to be on celebrity apprentice or something like that.

I don’t really know – I turned the TV off and picked up a book.

On an unrelated note, have you ever googled “dogs who look like Donald Trump?” I don’t recommend it. If you really want to see a dog who looks like Donald Trump, I’ll leave you with this link from Animal Planet, “Dog is Donald Trump Doppelganger.” As a bonus, it includes a picture of a chihuahua dressed like Sarah Palin.