Rise of the Planet of the Apes

Dr. Birdcage passed this along – “The List: 5 Reasons Why We Should Worry About an Ape Revolution.” It’s from Smithsonian Magazine’s Around the Mall blog.

With the impending release this Friday of the documentary summer blockbuster Rise of the Planet of the Apes, I thought we should all be prepared in case we ever face chemically enhanced apes that attempt to take over our world. In the past on our site we’ve investigated zombies and kept a running record on robot technology, but the threat of ape rebellion had yet to be cataloged. The National Zoo’s Amanda Bania, a keeper who works with the great apes, told me that gorillas, chimpanzees, orangutans and the other ape species can best us in many ways, even without being injected with mysterious serums by James Franco. This week’s list deals with 5 ways that apes outdo humans:

[read the whole post]

I mostly posted this to fuel JunglePete’s clearly rational and justified fears about the impending ape-based apocalypse.

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  • 1) He didn’t mention that primates are as proficient at feces slinging as Eastwood is with six shooters in any spaghetti western.

    2) Chimps are the soldiers. The revolution will be masterminded by an Aye-aye.

    3) My only fear is that the apocalypse doesn’t happen soon enough.

    • meanlouise

      I was just about to email you to let you know the email version of the post that went out wasn’t the final version – the corrected portion is mostly the last sentence pertaining to you.

    • meanlouise

      Also – good points.

    • meanlouise

      Also, dr. birdcage was in fort meyers last week and I regret not connecting y’all for a drink.