Category Archives: true life 2004

hell, other people

I’ve been doing crazy amounts of stuff that have been keeping me running around like, well, the crazy-woman I am. I don’t have the stomach for community organizing, I’ve learned (read: enduring threats and learning what overt racism exists in dc-metro area). I prefer being knee-deep in artomatic organizing, which is hard work but lots of fun. And much less scary.

Tomorrow, I will of course pause to light a candle for imprisoned freedom fighter Martha Stewart.

In the meantime, in lieu of more interesting content, here’s a roundup of some of the more entertaining random encounters with strangers from the last few weeks:

ladies room, lemur lounge, 3 weeks ago
drunk woman: “That vampire look really works for you.”

Metro train, last week
young woman: “You look like a goth Marilyn Monroe!”
(stranger still, others agreed)

Sephora, Pentagon city mall, sometime in the last few weeks
woman with lipgloss tester in her hand: “Does this smell like pee?”

coffee shop, today
woman with sandwich in her hand: “Do you think this will give me gas later?”
(which reminded me of the time Husband and I were checking out books at the library and the librarian randomly announced to Husband, “I love brocoli, but it gives me gas.”)

Today’s lesson: You can work from home, but you can never escape.

matchbox 20 humor, peyton place, and the stunning announcement that I've learned the secrets of time travel

This morning I’m trying to tame my inbox. As I was triaging my email over that first cup of coffee, I had a near-fatal giggling fit at this Onion article: “Matchbox Twenty Finally Finishes Watering Down Long-Awaited New Album”

Executives at Atlantic Records announced Monday that multi-platinum recording artist Matchbox Twenty, which set sales records in 2000 for its mega-hit release Mad Season, has finally finished watering down tracks on its long-awaited new album Beige.

“Everyone here at Atlantic is thrilled about what’s sure to be the biggest-selling, least-rocking record of the year,” Atlantic public-relations spokeswoman Janet Cosgrove said. “It’s been a long wait, but the incredibly boring results speak for themselves. Beige is bigger and blander than anything Matchbox Twenty has ever done.”

“Grab a chair, America!” she added. “The most uninteresting band in formulaic, corporate radio is back!”

[read the rest]

I really don’t like Matchbox 20.

This morning I picked up the Washington Post to find that my neighborhood has gone from “cozy Mayberry to nasty Peyton Place.” I didn’t get that memo. Where was I?

Me, I’m still busy worrying about the epic battle between God and Satan. I had no idea just how much was at stake this election! (as documented by the Bunny)

ronald reagan ratsnake

Walter the Green Garter Snake moved away last year, but there’s now a new serpent in the yard. He’s solving the mouse problem for me over by the hostas. I’ve named him Ronald Reagan Ratsnake. He stays on his side of the yard, I stay on mine. Everybody’s happy. Except maybe the mice.