This morning I’m trying to tame my inbox. As I was triaging my email over that first cup of coffee, I had a near-fatal giggling fit at this Onion article: “Matchbox Twenty Finally Finishes Watering Down Long-Awaited New Album”

Executives at Atlantic Records announced Monday that multi-platinum recording artist Matchbox Twenty, which set sales records in 2000 for its mega-hit release Mad Season, has finally finished watering down tracks on its long-awaited new album Beige.

“Everyone here at Atlantic is thrilled about what’s sure to be the biggest-selling, least-rocking record of the year,” Atlantic public-relations spokeswoman Janet Cosgrove said. “It’s been a long wait, but the incredibly boring results speak for themselves. Beige is bigger and blander than anything Matchbox Twenty has ever done.”

“Grab a chair, America!” she added. “The most uninteresting band in formulaic, corporate radio is back!”

[read the rest]

I really don’t like Matchbox 20.

This morning I picked up the Washington Post to find that my neighborhood has gone from “cozy Mayberry to nasty Peyton Place.” I didn’t get that memo. Where was I?

Me, I’m still busy worrying about the epic battle between God and Satan. I had no idea just how much was at stake this election! (as documented by the Bunny)