We used to have an office fish. His name was Fluffy. We had him for about 5 years. Sometimes, Fluffy had a white spot on his head. Other times it was on a fin. Other times he had no spot at all. You see, Fluffy was a magical fish.

Or, it’s possible that sometimes Fluffy went kaput and was secretly replaced by whoever had weekend fish-care duty. When we finally got tired of keeping up the facade, a coworker who we thought was smarter than that got very upset when he learned that the fish we were burying was actually Fluffy the 7th.

This is why we don’t have an office fish anymore.