(Happy-Birthday-Chimp-Note-Card-C117, originally uploaded by Z F Soo & made available under a creative commons license)
The oldest restored post from my archives is dated July 22, 1997 so I’m declaring this my blog’s birthday.
I hate the word blogiversary.
After littering my drafts file with post ideas for today, I scrapped them all and decided this: you’re going to get a present.
Not all of you, one of you.
A few of you.
Not sure how many yet.
Leave me a comment with an actual email address I can reach you at (no one else will be able to see it) and FRIDAY I will devise some arbitrary scheme for selecting winners.
update: you have until 5 p.m. EST to leave a comment on this post that will make you eligible for strange and exotic prizes.
The prizes will be groovy, but I’m not going to post pictures here because the contents of each prize might change slightly depending on where I need to ship them.
Then, you can spend the rest of your day celebrating any old way you wish.
Not sure how to celebrate? Start with a how-to video on proper Opossum pedicure techniques from our old friend M.E. Pearl:
I’m not sure if opossums should be pets. Or if you should give them pedicures. I am sure it’s an excellent video to start your day with. Don’t end your day with this video – that way lies nightmares.
If you want to get really crazy, you can encourage all your friends to like my facebook fan page, because facebook popularity plays some arbitrary role in whether a publisher wishes to publish me in dead-tree form.
And what could be more appropriate on a 16th birthday than some angst about popularity?
Well, I expect to receive all the stuff since I’m the only one who has left a comment so far.
I thought I missed the deadline. Good to know I’m still eligible. What are you giving away? Lee Press-On Nails?
I’m leaving another comment to better my odds.
I think people are afraid of what I might mail them. The comment to visit ratio is around 1/1500.
I promise: no opossums. Probably.
The backwoods of Florida aren’t the most hospitable of places to run field surveys. If you can ignore the mosquitos, chiggers, and gators, you still have the locals to contend with.
One time, we stumbled on a pretty elaborate set of possum traps. I won’t describe how the little guy was caught in this thing, but it wasn’t pretty.
He’d clearly been stuck there for a while and was hungry and tired from fighting it. I’m not one to stand around and let an animal suffer, so I grabbed some tools and my heavy work gloves and set to work on freeing the poor thing.
I’m sure it would have gone a lot smoother if he wasn’t hissing and scratching the whole time, but you can’t really blame him for that.
Lucky for him, he wasn’t caught in the homemade trap too badly so I was able to pry him out and free him. I was relieved he wasn’t hurt too badly. I wasn’t planning to put down a wounded possum when I went out to the field that morning.
After the little guy was released, he waddled back to the trees before stopping to turn around and give me one final hiss.
Anyway, if ever a possum could have used a weekend at the spa it was this little fella.
A possum story, to boot! Excellent – this comment may count twice.
Okay, two things:
-She tells you to report an injured (or orphaned) opossum to a professional wildlife rehab authority. Query: Does “injured” include dead? Because that’s the only injured state in which I have seen them on the road!
-Why do I find this old woman attractive?
We Runs a Possum Ferm in Suthern Georgia. We Gots Possum Cheese. Possum Milk. Possum Hats. You Names it. We Gots it. We Gots Recipes Fer Roadkil or Fresh Possum. We Sell Possum Twits by the Litter. Are Possum Bitches Has 14 Twits a Litter! Check out http://www.possumemporium.com fer Specials.
I already have your mailing address, so you should think verrrry carefully about the comments you leave here…..(cue evil laughter)
Hi, Rebecca! My grandpa’s family had great nicknames for each other. Two of his brothers were nicknamed “Brown”, and “Green Belly”. Though we frequently asked, we never got explanations for those two, but I’m sure they were gross. My grandma was “Pud” (which originated with her family), and Green Belly’s wife was “Possum”. One year at the family Christmas, someone gave Possum a can of alleged possum-meat, along the lines of SPAM. No word on whether they ate it. Oddly, no one called Grandpa anything other than Hugh as far as I can recall. Well, it’s a great name.
First comment for me–free stuff is a great motivator! Will like and share the FB fan page.
I don’t think I’d mind getting an opossum in the mail, provided it’s up to date on shots. Which if course it would be… right? Right?
oh hell, they need shots? I mean, um, sure! shots all around!
I didn’t comment earlier because I hab a code and didn’t want you to get sick. I don’t have an opossum story but there used to be some armadillos living under our back deck. Did you know they can jump?
I didn’t comment because I forgot.
Also at some point I apparently decided to be much, much quieter on the internet, and I have other excuses available if those aren’t cutting it.
I notice other people are leaving comments with actual content in them. I apologize for my lack of possum stories.
I’m not sure one should apologize for a lack of possum stories….
OK. I’m closing comments. Tomorrow when I’m less brain dead I’ll figure out how to select the winners & how many winners there will be. My people will be in touch :-)
Mostly what I’ve learned is that 90% of my readers don’t want me to know where they live. :-)
Well, I’m not technically closing the comments, but I’m not adding anyone else to the pool who comments after this point.
What? There’s a possum in the pool?