The winning entries to the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest are, as always, a thing to behold. I think my favorites for 2006 are toward the bottom of the page in the “Miscellaneous Dishonorable Mentions” category:

The goose waddled slowly, heavily, across the road, exactly the way my mother-in-law would if she were a goose.

Mary Montiel
Wichita, KS

Kathy, who had bound her breasts and cropped her hair, and lied about her gender to join a monastery of Jesuits in northern Kentucky, until she was discovered one night in the shower, winced as the dentist pulled her tooth.

Terry Johnson
Tularosa, NM

[read all of the 2006 “winners”]

Funny stuff. And a good diversion after watching too much CNN.