Galactica 1980

It may at last be time to face my arch-nemesis. No, not Wolf Blitzer. Galactica 1980.

I’m about to go totally meta here, and quote from that previous post about why you don’t want to try this at home:

Here are the original posts from that first little (mis)adventure, to help newer readers understand why they shouldn’t try this [watching Galactica 1980] at home. Not without first undertaking a rigorous training regimen. And possibly lobotomizing themselves with a number 2 pencil.

Remember people, I watch so you don’t have to. I am a trained media professional and this is the big time. You should not, I repeat, not, try this at home.

And if you do, I’m not responsible for the psychological carnage. Nor will I come to your home and scrape the fetid remnants of your anguished soul off of your rug.

1) galactica 1980 marathon, part I (caution: new series spoilers)

2) Cousin Oliver gets kicked to the curb; or, Galactica 1980 marathon, part 2

3) Mormons, or, Galactica 1980 marathon, part 3

4) Galactica 1980 marathon, part 4, wherein I talk about Knight Rider instead because I still haven’t been able to bring myself to finish watching episode 5

5) Galactica 1980 post part 5; I only wish the 6th episode starred Janeane Garofalo and David Hyde Pierce

6) And, if you got through all that, a bonus post, at no extra charge: The Big Score, and a minor Battlestar Galactica (new series) spoiler

(Original post here).

The DVDs are standing by. If anyone wants to undertake this mission with me, drop me a line. Be warned that you aren’t getting your mitts on one of the lollipops and you’re going to need to know me fairly well to be allowed to babysit.

The category index for Galactica 1980 is here.

Captain Styles and his nightly flag ceremony

97 year old Captain Ralph Styles (USN, retired) presides over two flag ceremonies a day in front of his house on Beach Road on Siesta Key. Local Coffee and Tea has a short article on their website declaring Styles a “Local Treasure,” and noting that the ceremonies have been taking place for about 12 – 15 years. I’d swear they started before I moved away, but I must just remember them from visits home later on.

The evening ceremony takes place minutes after the sun sets, and since his house is located on the point, on possibly one of the nicest spots to watch the sun set, he always has an abundant supply of participants and onlookers. Some days, there are costumes.

Thanks to the magic of youtube, I can post someone else’s video, since I was too lazy to shoot one of my own. I’m sad this one doesn’t include a live drummer, but that’s okay:

I really should have shot one of the morning flag-raising ceremonies, which are just as nice but aren’t well attended because they’re, well, early.

If you’re interested, here’s Captain Styles describing his military experience at Pearl Harbor:

Alone in the Dark

The Netflix Fairy brought us Alone in the Dark. I read the sleeve and couldn’t figure out what could possibly have compelled me to put this in our queue. Christian Slater, Tara Reid and Stephen Dorff do make an appealing trifecta of uber-badness, but that couldn’t have been the reason.

OK, there’s pop culture archaeology, too. That’s impressive, but not enough. If I get well enough to return to teaching pop culture and archaeology, I can’t imagine assigning anything with quite this much running and screaming.

It’s not the running and screaming that’s the problem. It’s how unconvincing it is. To be fair, my voice-over work only ever involved screaming. Maybe I’d be terrible at running and screaming, too. If someone would like to pay me a lot of money, I’d be happy to test this out.

Anyway.

Husband finally remembered why we wanted to see it: it’s directed by Uwe Boll. And it’s widely regarded to be his worst movie of all time.

Uwe Boll’s worst movie of all time.

Uwe Boll. The man who brought us BloodRayne. Holy crap, is BloodRayne a bad movie. That’s the the movie that one critic regarded as “not as bad as getting your eyelid caught on a nail.” The movie that did this to me.

I can’t wait.

The High Holy Days in Alexandria

Today is one of the High Holy Days in the city of Alexandria. That’s right: it’s Big Trash Day in our section of town.

(The City now calls it “Spring Clean Up,” but that name just isn’t catching on).

That means last night there were Trash Parties (Del Ray’s answer to Burning Man). These are the infamous annual events wherein much alcohol is consumed while mighty structures are constructed of the cast-off items that haven’t been scavenged yet by the roving bands of DIYers in minivans.

It was one of these parties that once led to sightings of an adult male wrapped in a futon and stuffed into a Hechinger’s lumber cart, being rolled down a neighborhood street while he yelled, “I’m the human hot dog! I’m the human hot dog!”

Good times.

I stayed home this year and watched I am Legend instead of partying, but more on that tomorrow.