Danny Bonaduce and Barry Williams battle bigfoot. Supporting actors include Howard Hesseman, Sherilyn Fenn, Alice Cooper, and the worst CGI bigfoot you’ll ever hope to see.

Over on The Twitter, everyone’s been in a swivet over this Slate article, “Save the Movie! The 2005 screenwriting book that’s taken over Hollywood—and made every movie feel the same,” which tells you the same thing every film school student has been moaning about for the last 8 years. Namely, that Hollywood has become fixated Blake Snyder’s book, Save the Cat! The Last Book On Screenwriting You’ll Ever Need, and every Hollywood movie now follows Snyder’s formula.

Bigfoot also follows a formula: The Asylum/SyFy formula for Saturday night craptaculars.

Here is the formula you will need to survive a night with this movie:

1. Make Martha’s mint-infused simple syrup (can be made ahead of time and refrigerated).

2. Put the following items in the blender:
-2 or more ounces of bourbon
-2 cups of ice
-quarter cup of mint simple syrup

3. Blend.

4. Pour into 2 highball glasses and garnish with mint sprigs.

5. Drink.

6. Repeat.

“Luckily” for you, the movie actually aired in 2012 so you can watch it at your leisure on Netflix.