Wonkette: “Yuppies, Is There Anything They Won’t Overpay For?”

Do you like cereal? Do you like eating multiple cereals at once? Do you have any dignity? If you answered yes to the first two and no to the last, then The Cereal Bowl in the now semi-revived Cleveland Park might just be for you! Even though there really is nothing more simple, nothing that connects man more with his roots, than his ability to put cereal in a bowl, add milk, fruit, whatever, and eat it, for breakfast, in his home, this task can now be completed for $4 at a place of business. This is either the stupidest concept ever, or… nope, nope. This is the stupidest concept ever.

The whole review (with excellent pictures) is hilarious.

My favorite part: “Some say having a place like this makes us as cool as New York. These people have not been to New York.”

Husband highlighted: “To add insult to injury, the employees all wear a “uniform” of pajamas. This is why the terrorists hate us.”

Washington City Paper restaurant reviewer Tim Carman has also posted a very funny review, “The Embarrassment of the Cereal Bowl.”

Carman bravely ordered, among other things, an item called “The Sweetest Thing.”

The Sweetest Thing, by contrast, is a dentist’s wet dream: a bowl filled with Lucky Charms, Cinnamon Toast Crunch, Fruity Pebbles, Nilla Wafers, and for a garnish, rainbow sprinkles. You feel dizzy just looking at it….the Sweetest Thing ($3.29 for a small) looked like someone had melted down a circus clown and tasted like cinnamon bun soup. I couldn’t finish it.

Carman posted a follow-up, Readers Cry Over Spilled Milk at the Cereal Bowl” based on email comments he solicited in his first post.

My memory is a bit mushy, but I recall both Georgetown and AU having a large variety of cereals available for mixing and matching in the cafeteria, although I don’t recall any sort of additional-toppings extravaganza being available.

The Cereal Bowl has other locations: in Miami (at the University of Miami), New Brunswick, NJ (Rutgers), and Qatar (Education Center). Proximity to a college campus seems more logical to me, but Cleveland Park is full of our peers, many trying to stave off the realities of all that aging and breeding by being all nostalgic for the processed foods of the 70s and 80s, so perhaps it’s a genius location after all. I guess time will tell.