Tag Archives: huckabee

our long national nightmare is over

Yesterday I had a meeting downtown and took a brief detour through the Smithsonian’s Sackler Gallery of Asian Art. I was looking at that lovely, serene building with it’s beautiful and dignified collections and it’s noble mission to educate and enlighten in the public sphere and I thought to myself, “You know, Washington really needs more overpriced and tacky shit.”

I’m not really sure how Washington, DC survived all these years without a Madame Tussauds, so you can imagine how happy I was when I opened the Washington Post this morning and saw that the new wax museum is nearing completion in the old Woodies building. I’d heard about this project, but was in complete denial, I think.

I’m relieved that kids will be able to see replicas of the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution. I’m often worried that they’ll go see the real ones for free. And in some sort of historical context or some such nonsense. The time I save no longer worrying about that can now be blocked off for fretting over the rise of Mike Huckabee. You’re saying “who?” now, but that’s what people outside of Arkansas said about Clinton, too. (Which? Both).

I [fear] Huckabee

I know I’ve been memed and I really will get to it. I’ve been very busy. Whereas her glamorous disability lifestyle includes watching copious amounts of Jerry Springer, mine includes a frightening amount of time spent sitting here in a cold sweat worrying about Mike Huckabee. (You thought I was going to say squirrels, didn’t you?)

Only 691 days until Huckabee’s Inauguration. Might as well start dress-shopping now. I do look good in red, at least.

It’s inevitable. I feel it in my bones. Even the ones that don’t have that nice constant deep-bone ache all of the time.

Doomed. Doomed, I tell you. He’s our next President, I just know it.

But more on this, much more on this, at a later date.